October 21, 2018

            The police visited our apartment today. I thought that the knock on the door might just be the neighbor who liked to visit my mom and gossip about the residents of the condo complex. Even though I often struggle to put my headphones on with one whole arm and an arm with limited mobility, the fight is worth it. When my mom gets deep into the gossip she laughs a shrill howl, it almost sounded like a wounded dog. At these moments I maxed out the volume on the headphones because I would rather lose my hearing to video games than my mom’s laugh. I think the visitors knocked on my doorframe at first because when I looked up from my video game, I saw two police officers in my doorway. They looked dismayed as if they bore some bad news, or maybe I saw pity in their eyes. I still can’t say for sure. I paused my game even though I died right after. I didn’t think the police would appreciate me playing video games while they stood in wait for me. Once they saw my Xbox turn off, they began to question me. So many questions and not all of them were good questions. They wanted to know about the day of the accident. I don’t think an accident like mine deserved a formal investigation, but I don’t understand any police requirements for my situation. I just trusted what I learned from cops. The only illegal thing I felt like doing was to smoke weed, but my mother would kill me if I did that in her condo. So, I haven’t smoked pot yet, so there was no reason for them to be at my mom’s condo for that. I feel paranoid just writing about it.

I have heard about the big Prop 2 push in Utah and have seen ads from both sides. My personal preference is a funny weed commercial I found on YouTube. The best part is when it talks about the side effects such as euphoria and uncontrollable giggles. But I’m not here to get political, because I have no desire to debate with myself. Cops just make people paranoid is the point. Anyways, back to the questions. They asked me if my mom and her husband had any issues before the accident. One, they were stupid enough to ask in front of my mother which caused a mild uproar. Two, I didn’t even interact with my mom a ton before this event. I agreed to go on the boat trip after her husband asked me to join him last minute. I think he wanted to try and bond with me a little. The last time I saw him before that day happened six years ago at their wedding. I didn’t seem to give the police the answers they wanted. But I wasn’t going to lie to them to make the Officers happy and piss my mom off. One Officer gave me his card and told me to call if I came up with any more information. I didn’t think people actually did that outside of movies.

I still haven’t found a way to meet new people yet. While the pain still feels intense, I now can stand and pee on my own. Now it’s a relief in two ways, haha, at least I think I’m funny. It seems that with all the broken bones my ability to make quality jokes has been crippled as well. Not to say they were good before, but I could at least make a date laugh from time to time. Now, I try my jokes with girls in online dating, and then they unmatch me. Sad shit. Maybe I should just google some good lines. I’m always open to suggestions from people who find ones that work.

A SL and PoS post.